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Friday 7 September 2012

Chez Pazienza: Jason Biggs's Pinky Swear

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Chez PazienzaCo-host, 'The Bubble Genius Bob & Chez Show'; writer, Deus Ex Malcontent

GET UPDATES FROM Chez Pazienza   Like 173 Jason Biggs's Pinky SwearPosted: 09/06/2012 6:04 pm React Amazing
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So you're never going to believe this, but Jason Biggs, the kid who made himself famous by pretending to fuck a pie, apparently has a really crude sense of humor and a filthy mouth to go with it. In case you haven't yet seen the mushroom cloud off in the distance to your right or felt the shockwave of indignation, let me help you out: The usual suspects among the conservative media are losing their minds over a couple of really crass comments Biggs made about Mitt Romney's wife, Ann, and Paul Ryan's wife, Janna, during last week's Republican National Convention. The offending cracks were offered via Twitter, as has become tradition in our culture, and were as follows:

I'd totes dip a pinky or two in Paul Ryan's wife's bleached asshole (she obvs bleaches her asshole). #RNC
"@godissanta420: @jasonbiggs How dare you ignore Ann Romney's asshole? ur un-American." Sorry ur right. I bet hers is un-bleached and hairy.

Tasteless? Extremely. Funny? Depends on your sense of humor, I guess. Over the line? Perhaps. Cause for the world to implode in on itself and a bunch of comically self-righteous members of the conservative media to suddenly, breathlessly clutch their pearls and turn into the Harper Valley PTA? No, not a chance. Stop me if you've heard this one before, but it's an offensive and vulgar joke made by a guy who makes his living in the entertainment industry, someone who has absolutely no influence on public policy or whose political opinions carry a single ounce of weight with anybody.

Biggs's Twitter feed is apparently a treasure trove of crudeness and it's entirely his own business if that's what he and those who follow him find funny. That particular form of media, which among all the rest has become the most conducive to verbal diarrhea, is like any other in at least one important respect: You don't like what you're seeing, you don't follow or you ignore. But as I've said before many times, that's not what we do these days. The opportunity to satisfy our perpetual need to feel personally victimized and to unleash a giant ration of turbulent outrage is just too great -- particularly when that highly selective outrage can be used to advance a specific political point of view, score a few pop culture PR points or collect an enemy scalp.

So you get what you're getting right now, which is Fox News trumpeting "Biggsgate" as its latest contrived controversy designed to rile up its audience, make it feel superior in both classiness and civility to the godless liberal menace it despises to the point of apoplexy, and divert its attention away from anything serious -- like the fact that Democrats are currently handing the GOP its ass through a startlingly impressive display of focus and backbone in Charlotte.

Yesterday, Megyn Kelly, who always comes off like an extravagantly groomed chihuahua who's very angry about being left in somebody's Louis Vuitton handbag for too long, curdled her face into that trademark sneer and lashed out at Biggs, calling him a "disgusting pig" and expressing well-rehearsed shock that Nickelodeon hasn't fired the actor from his voice-over job doing one of the characters in the upcoming Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reboot. Michelle Malkin soon jumped on board the umbrage train, using her Twitter curating website "Twitchy" -- and never has there been a more apropos name for anything associated with Malkin -- to make Jason Biggs, misogynist pie-fucker, public enemy number one.

While neither Fox nor Malkin -- nor that dingbat John Nolte over at Breitbart nor Brent Bozell's Newsbusters -- are launching any sort of targeted campaign aimed at getting Biggs kicked out of the Nickelodeon family, they're doing the more jittery suits at the network the favor of tying Biggs to bad publicity that, in their view, will tarnish the good name of Nick. The conclusion to be drawn and the action that should be taken with that in mind, as far as they're concerned, is obvious.

Now make no mistake: Critics of Biggs's comments have a point when they say that Nickelodeon shouldn't have promoted the actor's Twitter feed without a full understanding of the kind of things he regularly says on it. And Biggs, knowing that his tweets were possibly being read by Nickelodeon viewers, should've kept a lid on his crass sense of humor. The network has publicly apologized for leading its audience right into Biggs's dirty mouth, although it still hasn't decided what, if anything, it's going to do with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles star; the show hasn't even debuted yet and already there's trouble, although it can easily be argued that, even on a kids network, bad publicity equals good publicity.

But the outrage coming from the right on this remains breathtakingly disingenuous, given that at the same time Malkin was filing internet stories about how unacceptable Biggs's comments were, Ann Coulter was tweeting that Bill Clinton had impregnated Sandra Fluke backstage at the Democratic National Convention and Erick Erickson was taking fire for calling the DNC "The Vagina Monologues." Add to that the fact that people like Malkin and Megyn Kelly were quick to rush to the defense of Rush Limbaugh, or at the very least make excuses for him, when he called Fluke a slut, and the sudden drawing of a line in the sand becomes an act of almost comical hypocrisy.

The same people who are now taking very public offense to a really vulgar joke made by an actor, calling him vile and a misogynist, didn't bat an eye when a self-appointed pundit who has a rapt audience of millions and a stranglehold on GOP politics berated and sexually demeaned an average citizen day after day on his national radio show. It's almost farcical to hear the conservative media go on the attack with smarmy cracks like, "Stay classy, liberals," when they were such willing participants in the organized covering of Limbaugh's prodigious ass.

Limbaugh's comments really did cross the line, simply by virtue of the authority the Republican party has inexplicably given him and the fact that his defamation was intended to silence a political non-combatant who was doing nothing more than expressing an opinion that Limbaugh thought didn't deserve to be heard. As for everyone else -- Coulter, Erickson, Biggs and many others armed with a Twitter feed and a snarky opinion -- leave them the hell alone. Sure, there's an argument to be made that there's a difference between a guy like Biggs, who's an entertainer, and Erickson, who's a CNN-employed political pundit, but in the end it hardly matters anymore.

Social media has made everybody pretty much the same -- the same kind of asshole. And politics these days is a shitty, terrible bloodsport where every asshole gets a seat at the table. Expecting civility from just about anyone, particularly people desperate to get noticed amid the constantly growing noise, is a foolish conceit. Taking offense to every little thing somebody says, particularly about politics, will keep you safely away from living your life almost every minute of every day. It's just not worth it. Unless you're one of those jerks who's part of the indignation industry, who profits off of other people's need to feel victimized and offended, best to just ignore it altogether.

By the way, Biggs's wife, actress Jenny Mollen, has also drawn the wrath of the perpetually aggrieved conservative watchdog media by tweeting a joke about, as a horrified Newsbusters puts it, "statutory rape." The tweet in question:

"My husband is up for a Teen Choice Award which means tons of 8th grader pussy! Please make sure your kids vote!"

Now that's funny.

Crossposted at The Daily Banter

 

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FOLLOW MEDIA Like 50k   Get Alerts #ad_bottom_article_text {margin-bottom: 15px} Fox NewsTwitterSo you're never going to believe this, but Jason Biggs, the kid who made himself famous by pretending to fuck a pie, apparently has a really crude sense of humor and a filthy mouth to go with it. In c...So you're never going to believe this, but Jason Biggs, the kid who made himself famous by pretending to fuck a pie, apparently has a really crude sense of humor and a filthy mouth to go with it. In c... More in Media...
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of our newest badge: Community Curator. View AllFavorites Recency |  Popularity Page: 1 2 Next › Last » (2 total) photomoAb122 Fans 32 minutes ago ( 7:13 AM)Using bleach that way is just wrong (and could be dangerous too)!moAb: Using bleach that way is just wrong (and could behttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/moAb/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184739644.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… photoChuckling Abit0 Fans 2 hours ago ( 5:53 AM)The entire campaign season: annoyingly false umbrage from the outraged, followed by someone saying "Two wrongs TOTALLY make a right."Chuckling_Abit: The entire campaign season: annoyingly false umbrage from the outraged,http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Chuckling_Abit/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184731890.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… photoTheSimpleFarmer44 Fans 3 hours ago ( 4:23 AM)I really don't care WHAT he tweets or tweeted, but I would like to say that while I am NOT a fan of either of the GOP candidates or their wives, I find the remarks distasteful and unnecessary.TheSimpleFarmer: I really don't care WHAT he tweets or tweeted, buthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/TheSimpleFarmer/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184725648.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share it photodbw890658 Fans 37 minutes ago ( 7:08 AM)I agree, if these same remarks were said about Ms. Obama there would be calls for arrest for hate crimes.

Blast Mitt's positions or his stance on the issues, but you don't make those kind of comments about someone's wife.dbw8906: I agree, if these same remarks were said about Ms.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/dbw8906/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184739026.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments…This comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… DogmudgeonSaepe in Errore, Nunquam in Dubito184 Fans 4 hours ago ( 3:50 AM)The Conservatives don't much like it when they get a taste of their own medicine.

In this case, a dose of *Jarabe de Palo* -- less *Jarabe* and more *Palo*.Dogmudgeon: The Conservatives don't much like it when they get ahttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Dogmudgeon/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184723156.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… photoBlue hills20 Fans 5 hours ago ( 3:13 AM)People paid to give opinions lashing out at other people paid to give opinions for giving opinions - America thanks you!Blue_hills: People paid to give opinions lashing out at other peoplehttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Blue_hills/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184719912.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… photoHUFFPOST SUPER USERChris Corcoran247 Fans 5 hours ago ( 2:35 AM)This guy obviously watches a LOT of porn. Which is fine...but the comments are not helpful. And I really don't care for either of them or their husbands, but they deserve to be treated like any other human.Chris_Corcoran: This guy obviously watches a LOT of porn. Which ishttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Chris_Corcoran/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184715750.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… photo16years19 Fans 7 hours ago (12:52 AM)None of my comments have appeared, so I must disguise this point. What if a certain spouse of the current leader of the U.S. was named in these comments? Simply replace the name, and also the name of the 'vice' leader's wife into the first tweet. Still funny?16years: None of my comments have appeared, so I must disguisehttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/16years/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184697677.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… lisaNYConserv3 Fans   7 hours ago (12:35 AM)Opinions like these are turning more people away from liberals and the Democrats... shameless bias and double standards have made most Americans disgusted with this inexcusable behavior. Jason Biggs and his wife are far from funny and my family will be actively boycotting anything associated with him, including Nickelodean.lisaNYConserv: Opinions like these are turning more people away from liberalshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/lisaNYConserv/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184692966.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… photoHUFFPOST SUPER USERSillyxanderI will not put up lies. So don't post them.94 Fans 7 hours ago (12:18 AM)I find it funny that we worry so much about what actors and comedians say. Yeah they say and do stupid things but most of them aren't trying to be someone you look up to. They aren't are leaders and yeah I think it's funny how the people at fox start jumping up and down when this happens to conservatives but don't care what Coulter says. So do I care what he said not really do I want his job for it nope just like I didn't demand Rush's job. I think these people are hypocritical they didn't seem to demand Rush's head why do they Biggs.Sillyxander: I find it funny that we worry so much abouthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Sillyxander/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184687792.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… photo16years19 Fans 8 hours ago (11:52 PM)If this was said about Michelle Obama people on this site would be calling for this guy's head. I love to see hypocrisy, people defending this guy. Try it, replace Mrs. Romney or Ryan with FLOTUS or Mrs. Biden and see if you still laugh.16years: If this was said about Michelle Obama people on thishttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/16years/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184679339.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share it photoHUFFPOST SUPER USERHKR07893 Fans 6 hours ago ( 1:46 AM)Biggs is being crass, but how many out of line comments has the right made about Sandra Fluke, Michelle, Hillary or Chelsea?HKR07: Biggs is being crass, but how many out of linehttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/HKR07/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184708695.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share it anamericaninamerica10 Fans 1 hour ago ( 6:44 AM)Too many. The indecency is deplorable. Much of the so called entertainment people enjoy today is at someone else's expense.anamericaninamerica: Too many. The indecency is deplorable. Much of the sohttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/anamericaninamerica/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184736443.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments…This comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments…This comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… photoChip Falls3 Fans 9 hours ago (11:03 PM)I'd like Michelle Obama to vacuum my living room, like she was meant to. Obvs. Is that funny?Chip_Falls: I'd like Michelle Obama to vacuum my living room, likehttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Chip_Falls/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184661626.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share it photodbw890658 Fans 35 minutes ago ( 7:09 AM)Don't forget to have her make you a sandwich when she is done...

Hahah stereotypes and cruelty are so funny.dbw8906: Don't forget to have her make you a sandwich whenhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/dbw8906/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184739228.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments…This comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… HUFFPOST SUPER USERs3dg28 Fans 10 hours ago ( 9:57 PM)funny how liberal men get really tough when it comes to conservative women, yet wouldn't dare assert themselves with the blatant emasculating behavior their part asserts every day!! what a joke. hypocrites.s3dg: funny how liberal men get really tough when it comeshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/s3dg/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184643225.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share it photoHUFFPOST SUPER USERJezebelAlabamaLoving being part of a wondrous world279 Fans 8 hours ago (11:30 PM)Still funny.JezebelAlabama: Still funny.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/JezebelAlabama/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184670949.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share it photo16years19 Fans 6 hours ago ( 1:59 AM)And it would still be funny if it was about Mrs. Obama, or Mrs. Biden? If so, say so, if you think not then you are a hypocrite.16years: And it would still be funny if it was abouthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/16years/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184710847.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments…This comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… HUFFPOST SUPER USERjoshmcdonald66 Fans 8 hours ago (12:04 AM)Funny how you lumped everyone in with one crass lout.joshmcdonald: Funny how you lumped everyone in with one crass lout.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/joshmcdonald/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184683712.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. There are More Comments on this Thread. Click Here To See them AllspinnerLoading comments… spinnerLoading comments…This comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… photoHUFFPOST SUPER USERcritterzdad2Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.262 Fans 10 hours ago ( 9:32 PM)The Biggs tweets went somewhere over my head for humor but having survived 20 years in Vegas in the hospitality industry I can vouch for him that celebs and those around them gain a earthy sense of humor about life. Now, his wife's tweet- genius! roflmfaocritterzdad2: The Biggs tweets went somewhere over my head for humorhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/critterzdad2/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184636039.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… C Parent26 Fans 10 hours ago ( 9:30 PM)So you’d be ok if a jokester cracked about Michele Obama’s shavved and bleached Azzzholllee or Biden’s wife?
Oh and dipping fingers in? C’Mon peoplle when did we all lose sight of the standard for common decency? WOW I’m thinking we are all sinking down in to trash and have lost all our class.C_Parent: So youâ??d be ok if a jokester cracked about Michelehttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/C_Parent/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184635500.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share it photoHUFFPOST SUPER USERJezebelAlabamaLoving being part of a wondrous world279 Fans 8 hours ago (11:31 PM)Still funny but extra because his wife got in on it.JezebelAlabama: Still funny but extra because his wife got in onhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/JezebelAlabama/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184671106.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… HUFFPOST SUPER USERjoshmcdonald66 Fans 8 hours ago (12:05 AM)I'm not ok with this. I find it incredibly offensive.joshmcdonald: I'm not ok with this. I find it incredibly offensive.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/joshmcdonald/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184684002.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments…This comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments… photoHUFFPOST SUPER USERNicon570 Fans 11 hours ago ( 8:57 PM)The last highlighted tweet is so funny.Nicon: The last highlighted tweet is so funny.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Nicon/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184625664.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share it photo16years19 Fans 8 hours ago (11:57 PM)Imagine it being said about Mrs. Obama, still funny? I didn't think so.16years: Imagine it being said about Mrs. Obama, still funny? Ihttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/16years/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184681096.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share it photoHUFFPOST SUPER USERNicon570 Fans 5 hours ago ( 2:37 AM)YAh, that is not the tweet i am talking about. Way to feign outrage.Nicon: YAh, that is not the tweet i am talking about.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Nicon/jason-biggss-pinky-swear_b_1862717_184716007.htmlHistory |Permalink |Share itThis comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments…This comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments…This comment has been down-ranked into oblivion. View comment You have not right to carry out this operation or Error this operation. spinnerLoading comments…    Page: 1 2 Next › Last » (2 total) new comment(s) on this entry — Click to refreshspinnerLoading comments… 1 2 3 4 5 See All Highlights in × people have highlighted this! Huzzah! This text has been highlighted.

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